Fat

I can't remember which night, but I recently had a dream that I had huge love handles, so big that when I clenched any muscles, they would expand and get bigger. Weird. Also, I had another dream that I was at Disneyland, and I was part of some special event as an SM or something... It's finals week. I should really be studying for my next final in 60 minutes rather than writing in this blog to no one.

Oh well :)

I'm so Tired

I had some dreams last night, but I can't remember them. That seems to have become a recurring thing. I am so tired. I love working, and working hard, but there is so much going on in my life right now. My mom is dying. She is not expected to be here for much longer. And here I am, graduating and working harder at school than I ever have. I am working on three shows right now, not to mention scenes and essays for school. As I write this, I am in tech for a project happening next week. I am holding auditions for the new show I'm directing next week, and I am working on a show outside of school as an assistant director.

So, there is a lot happening. I have been very bad about writing lately, but I haven't had many dreams, as I am so tired. So sorry, if anyone reads this blog and you feel cheated that I am writing a dream diary without dreams. Maybe once I am finished with school they will come more... In any case, I will try to be better and keep up more.

Too Real

Dream Diary 2/11/12:

• I dreamed that I was taking an acting class, and that I had a scene with the teacher, but I only knew the first two and the last lines of the scene we were supposed to do together. I freaked out, but when I skipped them, the teacher just said it was cool that I was acting so hard I didn't need the words. Haha.

Dream Diary 2/13/12:

• I had a dream that Christopher Nolan was working on a new film, and somehow he invited me to come and do voiceover work. He told me to come in at 11, and I thought he meant pm, but as the night went on, I even became super late to the pm call. I ended up leaving around 2 am, but I woke up before I got there. I was really worried the whole night that I was going to wake my roommate, but she woke up anyway and it was ok. *I told myself in the dream that I would know if it was a dream or not by checking to see if my phone had Christopher Nolan's phone number. It doesn't.
• I had a Peter Pan-like dream where I was a kind of Lost Boy. My friends got captured and were going to be put to death, but I went in to sacrifice myself to save them. But Peter came and saved all of us. 
• Something about haunted houses- I think I was trapped in one, and it might have been sentient. *Credit this one to my dad, who made me watch the Shining this weekend.

The End of the World

Dream Diary 2/67/12:

• I don't remember all of last night's dream, but I do know it had to do with the end of the world. I remember taking a road trip with my mom and dad, and we stopped a couple of places... I remember looking at a waterfall in the dark when they were asleep. Then I was in the back area of some kind of warehouse or club, and all I knew was that the world had ended in it's own way, and that I was supposed to help it start back up somehow, but I was trying to do it in a way in which there would be nothing evil in it. Very strange. Also, interestingly enough, the end of the world wasn't a bad thing- it was just the end. It was just the natural order of things. I thinkn there were other people there too- not a lot, but a few. No one was freaking out or attacking each other or anything the way they sometimes do in movies- we all just were. 

I don't believe the world is ending this year. I just found it interesting that I had a dream about it, and it wasn't scary or evil- it just was. I don't know... I definitely hope the world doesn't end this year- there are so many things I still have done that I want to do- like have a boyfriend, or hike to the top of Half Dome in Yosemite (the back way- no cliffs for me). Anyway, cheers to NOT the end of the world this year. :)

Dolphins and Pulleys

Dream Diary 2/312:

• This dream was very ocean-themed. From what I remember, I was a friend to the dolphins, and we were being attacked by some evil people. I remember being on a beach, and seeing the skeleton of a dolphin. After seeing this, we decided to attack the evil people ourselves. I went into the water and swam with a dolphin to the bad people, who happened to be in the water. I let go of the dolphin and swam towards him myself. They tried to shoot me with a machine gun, but the bullets just went into the sand. That's all I remember.

Dream Diary 2/5/12:

• Last night was a few different dreams I remember little pieces of. Mainly, I was getting together with my family for a holiday, Halloween I think. Something weird happened to our cars, and somehow we ended up at our old condo. I remember showing off and walking along a narrow railing without falling off, like a cat. Then one of my friends from school was there, and he was trying to fight a ninja using and elaborate pulley system of cars.

Long Time, No Dream

I haven't posted in awhile due to the simple fact that I have not been dreaming lately. I attribute this to the fact that being back in school has given me less time to sleep; I am too tired to dream, or at least to remember my dreams when I wake up.

I did have dreams last night, but I already forgot them- they were something to do with real life, so probably of no interest to anyone besides myself anyway.

I am so busy this week. I am Assistant Directing a show (shout out to ensemble- you guys are awesome!) outside of school, I am Fight Choreographer for a show at school, I am directing a scene for class, and I have to be in a scene for a different class. I love being a part of everything, but sometimes it's a lot.

I was lucky enough to see an advanced screening of Pirates: Band of Misfits! before it was officially released in theaters. I loved it, as I love many of the voice actors, and I think British humor is way funnier than American. What saddened me was the fact that one of my favorite parts in the film and the part of the trailer that really made me want to go see the movie was the reference to lepers. I'm sorry if you're a leper and this offends you, but I think it's bullsh*t that the moviemakers were forced to take that part out. It wasn't cruel to lepers at all; it was just using it for comedic effect. Also, leprosy is treatable now- it's not like thousands die every day from it. As I am not a leper, I guess I can't make too strong of a case here, but I really  feel that the reference in the film was based on comedic innocence, and not a drive to undermine the ILEP or any of the lepers living today.

So, sorry for the rant. I didn't have a dream, so it was the best I could think of for now.

Lost Cat

Dream Diary 1/23/12:

• Last night I dreamed that I had lost a cat in a huge house and I had to find him and help him because he was injured. He was black, with a white chest, white tips of his ears, and white on his paws. I looked everywhere for him before I discovered that he was hiding in a drawer.

I also had a dream a couple of nights ago that I was given fake money at work, and I used the magic pen and everything, but when the customer drove away, it was definitely paper. I was scared to give it to my boss, when he had just lectured us about the dangers of counterfeiting. 

Not much exciting. Since school started, I have been so tired a lot that I have had trouble remembering my dreams when I have had them. 

Graduation

Dream Diary 1/17/12:

• Just remembered my dream from last night. I was graduating, and driving around in a golf cart as part of my job before I graduated college. My family was kind of lost, so I had to go get them I realized that I didn't have any of my gear required for graduation- no cap and gown or anything. But I went up in my pretty dress and high heels and graduated anyway.

Kind of weird about graduating. I'm not sure how a year or two in the real world is going to go with my acting B.A.... but we'll see.

Celebrating MLKJ Day

Dream Diary 1/16/12:

• My computer was on the fritz, so my dad took me shopping for a whole bunch of new stuff. I got a huge body pillow and a new computer. Then, I was at a theme park that i thought was Disneyland. I was with a huge group and helping to look after some of the younger kids. We all went on a ride that was extremely similar to Mullholand Madness from Disneyland, but ended up being almost more like Goliath from Six Flags Magic Mountain. There were a couple of HUGE drops that we went down, and then a HUGE loop-the-loop we were supposed to go around. But none of us really got up enough speed to go all the way around, so we went part of the way up and then came ack down and landed in  a park somewhere. Then my mom almost got hit by something, so I yelled at her to watch out, but she got mad that I yelled at her and said I also didn't make the reservations for that night. I had never heard that I had to make the reservations, but I got on the phone anyway and made reservations to eat on Martin Luther King, Jr.'s birthday. The guy on the phone sounded really stressed, but nice. I made a reservation for 9:45pm. 

An interesting note for this dream: I actually woke up at the very end, right after I got off the roller coaster. I was able to turn of my alarm and go back to sleep back into the dream. When this happens, I would say I usually have about a 70% success at getting back into the dream. Sometimes I just can't, and other times I'll get back into it, but it will take a completely new direction. 

The FBI and Me

Dream Diary 1/15/12:

• My brother ate something weird and became a dangerously smart savant who was threatening national security. I however, was able to go in and reverse the effect using burnt popcorn. Due to my heroism, the FBI decided to train me to become a secret agent. I was scheduled for interesting classes and had strange homework, part of which seemed to be training on arcade games that simulated violent situations. I ran out of money for the games, though, and I had to come up with another way to do my work. 

I had another dream the night before, but I can't remember it now... that should be a lesson for me to write down all of the ones that have happened to me. 

Zombies

I think the dream I had the night before last might prove that I have some sort of psychic abilities.

Dream Diary 1/8/12:

• I dreamed that I was was completely unprepared for the callbacks I was supposed to run tonight. I didn't have any exercises to do, and I forgot my cd player, and everything was just awful.

Dream Diary 1/10/12:

• I was over at a friend's house, and somehow we became aware that there was a zombie outside trying to get in. We locked all of the doors to make it couldn't get us, but it was an intelligent zombie. It found the car outside, and drove it through the house- literally through, crashing through walls and stuff- to make us go outside. We headed to her archery range so we could shoot it. While we were getting all of the stuff, the zombie touched me and annother person, which turned us into zombies. Eventually, my friend shot an arrow into his heart (after a couple of misses lodged in his chest). At first, we stayed zombies, but then since our creator was dead, we began turning back into humans. I remember, because the other zombie person pulled their heart out and saw it was starting to beat again, so they put it back. 
• I saw this was a prediction dream, because I DID kind of turn into a zombie yesterday. I felt like one at any rate. I started my menstrual period (yeah, I said it) and I always get really tired and gross the first day. I TURNED INTO A ZOMBIE!

Dream Diary 1/11/12:

• I was playing an intense game of hockey with some strange people. Then, someone new entered the game, and we had to teach them how to play. I decided that while this was taking time, I needed to go get my hair cut. I went to the place my friend works at, but the person at the front desk told me that they didn't have that option any more. I was really mad, and then, to top it off, my hone died. So I went  back and continued playing hockey with those people. Our goalies sucked. 

Revelations

Last night I didn't have a dream, but I learned that I can balance a water bottle on my head whilst riding a bike with no hands.

I have been able to balance things on my head and ride a bike with no hands independently of each other for a while, but until last night, I had never combined the two. Interesting, the things you learn about yourself over your life.

School started today. I am pretty excited about my classes, and also for the show I am Assistant Directing this quarter. I have the pleasure of working at my old high school, and we're doing SHAKESPEARE! I was on the other side of the table for the first time tonight, and I really enjoyed myself. Thanks to AL and everyone who is working on this project with me. We're going to have soo much fun! :)

War and Death

Dream Diary 1/7/12:

• I dreamed I was blind and living in the Renaissance era. For some reason, I was in an art gallery, where the people of the first floor decided to attack and make war on the people of the second floor. While they executed strategies and such, a vampire in one of the paintings came to life and fell in love with me.

Dream Diary 1/8/12:

• We were at a funeral home and i was searching for my coat. There was also a tiny puppy there.

Aliens and Church Camp

Dream Diary 1/6/12:

• In my first dream, I was a humanoid alien slave sent to the ruler of a colony in a desert-like area. I was kind of shaped like the aliens in Avatar, but I wasn't blue. I missed the place I came from, and the ruler was nice enough to let me climb a tower-like structure  to look out over the desert. It was really hot  up there though- there was only a tiny little umbrella thing to cover me.
• I was in a church camp group, and I think we might have gotten lost somehow, because we ended up having more of a survival camp than church camp. There were giant alligators trying to eat us, and continuously wrecking our bamboo huts. 

Dreams

Dream Diary 1/4/12:

• Pretty boring for people who don't know these people. I was at my old high school with a friend who's directing Twelfth Night this quarter at my school. We talked about the show because I was her Lighting Designer (even though in real life, I'm just helping out).

Dream Diary 1/5/12:

• I had two dream last night. I lived in a castle (but in modern times), and I was five years old and a boy. To impress my father, I my siblings and I had a sort of contest/race: whoever could go and catch 7 trout without anything to help them, and then catch the king monster trout who was 3 times bigger than all the others would be the winner. I raced across the moat bridge and ran into town, where there was a large lake and i knew I could find some trout. When I found the lake, I jumped in, but I was almost carried out to an island in the middle of it by the super strong current. The island had a huge playground on it, so at first I was tempted to go there, but then I remembered my mission and swam back to shore before I got too far out. I sat on the side of the lake and dangled my hands and feet in. I caught 5 trout pretty fast, but then I had a dry spell and got distracted by something. Then, in the way dreams do, I whooshed into the next day, where I had magically grown up into Jason Bateman. I couldn't catch the rest of my fish, but I drove back to the castle anyway.
• This dream was rather creepy at some parts, although I can't remember all of it- mostly the end. Part of the time I was in my house, but it wasn't my real house, it was weirdly similar and not. I was worried about something, I think the electrical wires. I next remember being in some crazy underground labyrinth place, and some evil guy was menacing me, and then a hot red hotrod came out of nowhere and chased the evil guy away down into hell. It was because the evil guy had killed him and he came back as a sportscar for revenge. Then it turned all movie-like; there were a whole bunch of shots leading down into the basement where it turned into hell with a creepy janitor with huge, bulging blue eyes holding the door open for people to go down. I was walking back down into the hell area, when I saw a door on a ledge and climbed a ladder to it. I helped my friend escape as well when she saw what I was doing.

Do you understand it? I don't. 

They are interesting though. The first one about pleasing my father might have drawn from the fact that I watched Thor for the first time last night with my friend.

The Sun and I

Hello all.

So I had work disgustingly early this morning, which for me means at 6:45 am, meaning I had to get up at 6. As a theater major and person, this time is never agreeable to me. I often as not go to bed at 1 am, and try to sleep as late as I can before getting up. I prefer nighttime to daytime anyway. The sun can't follow me into night, and we have a long enmity punctuated by the sun's attempts to do me harm. Actually, I just burn extremely easily. Fall and Winter are my favorite times of year. Many people down here in SoCal complain that the sun goes away early, and I just sit there and smile smugly to myself whenever I hear that.

Anyway, after a long detour, I can say that getting about 3 hours of sleep (after staying up watching TV online because my sleep schedule is that way) I had no dreams during the night. However, when I came home, I did have a dream that slipped away from me right as I woke up. To the best of my knowledge, it was:

Dream Diary 1/3/12

• Something to do with Buffy the Vampire Slayer- hunting evil and such. 

This was probably due to the fact that I watched it all last night before I went to bed. It's all on Hulu, and while it is a bit dated, I enjoy watching the show because I consider Joss Whedon a genius writer/director. Him and Christopher Nolan are practically gods in my opinion. If you haven't seen Whedon's "Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog", take 45 minutes out of your day and watch it. You can find it online. It's amazing. 

When I woke up this afternoon, my cat was sleeping next to me. I'll describe her more in another blog sometime, but I just wanted to mention that she was dreaming too. Her paws and ears were twitching at times, and I just thought "like mother, like daughter" to myself. It made me laugh- but not so loud as to wake her up. 

I leave with this BBT reference:

"Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr purr purr."

:)

New Year's Resolutions and More

Hey all.

So, it's been forever and a half since I updated this blog. I am usually kind of bad about this sort of thing- whenever I have endevored to keep a recording of my life in days gone by, whether it be by diary, journal, or online blog, I have found ways to strictly keep to my convictions for a short time before letting them ascend to the back corner of my mind where I safely forget them.

Hopefully not so this time.

Along with keeping this blog more accurately and temporally (was that the right word?) I plan to exercise more and eat better. I did that over the summer and it worked for me- before I let it ascend to the... so on. I also plan to see my family more often. You never know... about death and so on.

To take a slightly depressing turn here, for those of you who don't know me my mother is terminally ill with a brain tumor that has persisted in coming back despite chemo and two surgeries. She is not expected to live through the year. This has had a huge impact on my life and that of my family. She is not in any pain, and she and my father are both home based, so she doesn't have a lot of stress in her life, which is great. She often spends entire days in bed watching movies and sometimes comes out for forays to Disneyland, where she, my dad, and myself all have annual passes. So, it's sometimes difficult for me to choose between going out with friends and staying home; I feel selfish for wanting to go out and have fun, as I am 21 and love to dance (even though that doesn't mean I actually can...) and I want to seize my youth. But I only have so much time left for her and the clock is ticking. Also, I have a lot of theater commitments in and out of school, and this often tears me in half- I have rehearsals very late and entire months are eaten with preparations, and then my family hates me for not visiting. I just don't know what to do sometimes.

I want to take this time to thank my friends who have helped me a lot the past couple of years. I don't know what I'd do without you.

Steering in a slightly different direction, I am going to say that I fully intend to uphold my dream diary to the fullest on this blog. I am including dreams that might not be interesting to everyone, but oh well. Hopefully this intensely strange dreams I often experience will make up for that. For instance, one time I dreamt I was out with Benedict Cumberbatch (fantastic British actor; if you don't know who he is, look him up) and we ran into Daniel Craig, and they sort of fell in love, and then we had to fight a giant squid that was breaking up the pier we were on. Weird, I know. I love it though.

Dream Diary 1/1/12:

• Last night I dreamt that I was an X-men. I was a female blue monster, not unlike Beast, but in girl form. Myself, along with some others (none of whom I remember being actual X-Men characters) had to catch a bad mutant. I was the only one who caught up with him and finally fought him. He named me "Amazeing Mad". I know the spelling was like this because it appeared in captions on the bottom of my dream. After that, I went back to school with the other mutants, but I was really insecure about my appearance, being all blue and hairy. Anyway, I found a watch that would let me change my appearance into a rather large, blonde- haired, blue-eyed caricature; pretty much a cartoon. Anyway, I had to perform a song with a classmate, and by the end of it I decided that I'd rather look the way I was rather than hide it. Perhaps this could be seen as my on-again-off-again desire to lose weight, or it might just be an incredibly strange dream. :)

With that, I take my leave, adding only to anyone who reads this blog that you will soon be treated to a long description of why I am enamored with Jamie Bell and  Rupert Grint. For now I say, Jamie, you are one of the most talented young actors of our generation; you light up the screen with your performances, even if I do not always care for the subject matter (you need to stop teaming up with silly American teen throbs). And as for Rupert, I love your capacity for comedy (Wild Target is amazing!) and your great relaxation with your art form. Also, as I am also a redhead, we need to procreate for the good of our species. Two redheads will always make another, and it has been pointed out that red hair is dying out. We must prevent this!

Last but not least, I have decided that I will also be going through my personal movie collection one dvd at a time, critiquing it and saying what I like or dislike about each of them. It is possible to own movies you might not be truly enamored with if you have another incentive for owning them (Jumper and Jamie Bell, *cough!*).

Anyway, if anyone is reading this, thank you for reading, and if not, well, I shall enjoy remembering my dreams and other things that pop into my life. Thank you, and Happy New Year!